Naughty Letters to Ms. Mac

Countless noble souls (and many fluffy kittens) sacrificed their lives during the making of this blog. We think you will agree they were worth it.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Christmas Curmudgeon

Dearest Ms. Mac, Light of My Life,

I had to come to work exceptionally early today, and the bleariness of my consciousness notwithstanding, it was really rather pleasant striding like a mini Valkyrie through the freezing fog down the main street of the village, which I had all to myself. Christmas lights in shop windows twinkled at me through the grey dampness, creating an ambiance very much befitting my True Fairy Princess status.

My abnormally good mood is due entirely to the fact that, after a week of insomnia, of forlornly trailing around the house at night with a mattress and sleeping bag, trying to find a comfortable (and quiet) sleeping spot as far as possible from the snoring, man-flu stricken Evil Hubster, the snuffling, twitching offspring, the clanking and overly hot radiators, the nocturnal squeaking of the hamster wheel and the indignant shuffling and muffled chirps of the canaries and budgies, I finally scored!

I made myself a cosy nest on the upstairs landing between the loo and my study, and proceeded to indulge in eight hours of delicious, dreamless sleep. You must be so proud of me! After all those costly appointments I have made at Ms. Mac's World Famous Institute of Slumber, your wisdom is finally rubbing off on me.

To add to my chirpiness, I'm wearing my new pinky-purpley dangly earrings (identical to the red ones I gave you last month but which have unaccountably not yet been boasted about on your little blog thingie), AND am wearing my hair in a chignon, wrapped in a hair scrunchy decorated with dangly beads, so the overall clinking-clanking-jingling effect as I walked along was most pleasing.

However, I do wish to register a small complaint.

Has the vulgar, modern trend of upside-down Christmas trees reached your tiny, conservative Village of the Damned? I swear it's the silliest look ever! I'm afraid I'm turning into a hopeless Old Git. I thought I could keep up the fa├žade of being young in spirit, and totally groovy Baby, but damn! Christmas is supposed be a cosy, familiar affair, not one spiced with a dangerous thrill. Hmph.

Crusty old love and kisses,
Mrs. Ancient McHasBeen


  • At Wed Dec 12, 05:02:00 pm, Blogger Heather said…

    Oh my goodness - I had to google the upside down Christmas Tree and I have bit one thing to say? Why?

    Okay, I have more to say...why change something that is tried and true? It looks a tad ridiculous, non?

    Congrats on the peaceful walk to work - I used to enjoy that myself, one upon a time. Although I was in the Downtown East Side of Vancouver, so it was much less pleasant.


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