Dearest Queen of Distended Bum Flaps,

My love, how you have made me laugh on this Valentine's Day morning. A good old belly chuckle is worth so much more than merely hearts and flowers. I too am proud of your your friend of a friend's triumphant trumping prowess. I only wish I had been there to witness it- at the friend of your third cousin twice removed's neighbour's sister's dog walker's house of course, because I know that kind of thing never happens you your house.

How is your morning so far? I have been out striding in the hills already and now and going to sit down for a heavy day of internet surfing and occasional telly watching interspersed with the odd conversation or two with Mr Mac.

Oh, oh! Mr Mac has grown a beard! It took him all of three days while I was away- that's how virile and masculine he is but I think he'll have to go clean shaven to work on Monday. I shall take full advantage of kissing him over the weekend though. Sadly, I have been menstruating this week which has prevented full-on beardy shag attacks. Do you think that was far too much information? Oh well.

With love on this cold and frosty morning,

S
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