Naughty Letters to Ms. Mac

Countless noble souls (and many fluffy kittens) sacrificed their lives during the making of this blog. We think you will agree they were worth it.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Titillating Tuesday

Dearest Little Lotus Blossom and Light of my Life,

I hereby declare that today I am a Box of Fluffies! I don’t know why I am feeling so good. By rights I should be mourning your absence from my side, and spending my lonely days contemplating your dear photo, sniffling from time to time and wiping dust off my Shrine to Stella with my damp hankie, shouldn’t I?

Instead, I leapt from my bed with a single bound today, at an indecently early hour, cut a huge bouquet of sweet, white lilac from the garden with which to perfume my office, and sashayed to work in a pink blouse, B&W floral skirt, and new pink, morale-enhancing shoes!

I suspect my good mood may have something to do with the news report sent to me by The Lovely Mickle, concerning my heroes - manly, virile Jemaine and cutey-pie Bret from The Flight of the Conchords. It appears the innocent lads were invited to a ‘spit roast’ by a Scottish lassie, and accepted, thinking they were going to a barbecue… To their great embarrassment, it turns out to be slang for a threesome. A sexual event! Shock horror!

So obviously, the mere notion of a threesome with Bret and Jemaine (oooh, Jemaine!) has had a profound effect on my very vitals.

Yours, in quivering anticipation,

Antipo

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