She Hasn’t Forgotten Me!

I managed to harrass The Lovely Ms. Mac sufficiently by sxt msg (“Darls, how is Scottish Pilgrimage road trip progressing? Missing you horribly. I may never recover from the trauma. Love and sedentary kisses, Antipo xxx”); to the point where she felt obliged to answer me.

She sxted me from Folkestone this afternoon, where they had arrived safely, thanks to the new woman in her husband's life: Mrs TomTom SatNav. They managed all those miles without murdering the children or capsizing the ferry in a tragic Christmas Present Overload Accident.

Antipo to Ms. Mac:

Darls! I can’t believe you are already in the Land of Walkers Crisps and Rowntrees Fruit Pastilles. Will you get me some Rollos and a Curly-Wurly?

Am rather pissed off that my wee “surprise” parcel did not arrive in your letterbox before your departure. I posted it two weeks ago! Bastarding Post Orifice. When The Lovely Andi posted her stunning framed photo to me it only took five days to get from Ohio to France!

I do hope your bum is lovely and warm, unlike mine.

Ms. Mac: Oh Dear, bad Stella! The little “surprise” did arrive last Friday, and I put it straight under the tree and forgot to say Frank You! It’s waiting for me when I get home where I won’t have to share it wif anyone!

Just had Marks & Spencer sangas for lunch: Aberdeen Roast Beef and Ale Chutney, shared with a King Prawn and Loch Muir Salmon with Craigie. Yumm, yummmm.

Things I love: cruise control in the neo-classic Mercedes and M&S sangas!

Missing you horribly!
Xxx xxx xxx


Antipo: Oh thank God the "totally surprisey surprise" arrived safely after all! You can spank me later.

8 pm

Antipo: Darls, feel free to send me any words you want blogging. It would bring such joy to my drab little loife.

So have ye reached Bonnie Scotland yet? I suppose you are drinking whiskey and Tossing the Caber all over the place. Better your caber than your cookies! I suppose you’ll bump into Paolo Nutella down the pub every night.

In other celebrity news today, The Lovely Kristin in Arizona sent me SIX (6!) packets of ranch dressing mix! You wouldn’t believe how happy this makes me. Actually you would believe it, even if other infidels wouldn’t. Kristin and I are just about Best Buddies now. All she wanted in return was naked pictures of my hamster. But don’t worry, you will always be my first Apfelwähe Love. Yes, I am a little tipsy tonight, why do you ask?

Remember, I will be blogging all subsequent sxts from you. I have nothing better to do!

Hot lurve and French kisses,
Antipo
xxx

Ms. Mac: How very kind of you! You could stick our sxts on the Naughty Blog if you like, if you deem them funny enough, of course!

In Bonnie Scotland since about 15 mins ago. When we crossed the border, James asked “Is that it? That’s us in Scotland?” He obviously expected pipers in kilts and perhaps a tattoo (the military kind, of course!). How disappointing for him.

Only an hour or so before we get to Mum’s! Please God, let me not kill the boys by then!

Och aye the noo, hen!
Xxx xxx xx