Naughty Letters to Ms. Mac

Countless noble souls (and many fluffy kittens) sacrificed their lives during the making of this blog. We think you will agree they were worth it.

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Dearest Silver Sleeve,

Urgh, you just about made me vomit my bacon quiche all over my desk. Thank you for that.

I’m so sorry to hear of your repulsive illness, but it will cheer you up to know that I’ve got my naughtiness mojo back. My erotic dreams last night did not involve my doctor, strangely, but a mystery Olympic shot put champion, who kindly agreed to give me a private training session, in order to improve my technique.

We went down to an athletics stadium on a sunny day for the session. He stood behind me to show me how to position my arms and legs correctly, but I was driven to distraction by the feel of his body pressed to the back of mine. I was sure he had a huge piece of equipment cunningly concealed in his trousers and I was longing for him to rub it hard against me. He was frustratingly proper though, and behaved like a total gentleman the whole time. Damn!

It was a hot day and we were both sweaty and breathless after the exercise. After the session, my coach sent me to the shower, but I saw him entering the bathroom behind me, and then slowly and surely his hands stripped me of my white t-shirt, white shorts and white cotton panties. His teasing kisses played on my lips, down my neck, and across my shoulders as his hands roamed my eagerly trembling body. He knelt in front of me, slowly running his hands up my calves, lightly brushing the backs of my weakened knees and trailing up my hot, quivering thighs. I made a move for the shower, but he held me firmly, not yet letting me relax. I had to stand still for his attentions, not allowing my knees to buckle.

He was now so close that I could feel his hot breath on my - and then the sodding alarm clock screeched in my ear, brutally woke me up and shocked me to pieces! I have not yet recovered from the trauma and disappointment.

In other naughty news, I nearly fainted with joy when I discovered a blog all about penises! And not just any old penises, but clever, witty ones.

You simply must add Todger Talk to your blog list at once.

Do you think our American readers will know what todger means though?

Public Service Announcement: If any of you handsome and well-endowed American readers are in the dark about this matter, I would be more than pleased to help you locate your todger. All in the interests of improving Franco-American diplomatic relations, of course.

So, dearest Ms. Mac, are you feeling better now? I’m better than medicine, aren’t I?

Clinical hugs and stethoscope kisses,


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