Malingering Monday

Dearest Ms. Mac,

I do hope you are well this sunny morning, and certainly not limping around, groaning in pain, and hampered in your every move by stiff, aching muscles and massive haematomas in fetching shades of yellow/purple/blue…

In fact I hope you are on form for dishing out bucket loads of tea and sympathy, for I am wounded and gravely injured from top to toe – indeed, it’s a miracle that I can actually lift a finger to type this missive.

Yesterday I was running through the forest with my son, when I tripped on an evil tree root malevolently concealed beneath piles of fallen autumn leaves and went sprawling onto my right shoulder, hip and knee. It was such a shock to find myself suddenly horizontal with no warning, breathing in leaf mulch and worm droppings! Also, my dignity was dealt a severe blow.

So I hope to receive kind, soft words of sincere sympathy from you, but knowing you, I may have to settle for some smug “I told you so”s instead.

Thank goodness I have Vivi’s new baby excitement
to cheer me up and take my mind off the pain!

Muchos invalidos besos,

Antipo
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