I'M BAAAAACK!

Dearest Holiday Girl,

I'm back in the hot seat and while you are gallivanting around Bonnie Scotland, sleeping late every day and resting your precious neurones, I am chained to my computer and staring in shock at the amount of horrid WORK that needs doing in my poor, neglected orifice.

My brians feel like they might shut down at any moment.

But I am contriving a few cunning updates in my mind, as I can't wait to tell you all about catching up with my family, old and new friends in NZ and Melbourne, and our exotic stay in Hong Kong, including:

- an astonishing hotel room upgrade from budget hovel to luxury penthouse suite!
- a hilarious "eyelash extension" débâcle in a beauty salon!
- freshly squeezed guava juice and dainty club sandwiches in a very classy bar!
- post retail therapy burnout traumatic syndrome!
- a perfect flight back to France sadly spoiled by an abandoned suitcase explosion lockdown situation (with pix)!

The fun just never ends.

Write to me soon. I've missed you horribly. I bored all my friends to death by telling them how much I missed you and that life without you just wasn't worth living. They had to ply me with good food and drink to try and help me survive.

Dazed love and feeble kisses,

Antipo

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